all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize