Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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