My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize