don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
you made out with another girl for some wings
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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