omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I know her cup size but not her name....
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize