I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
