i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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