I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize