New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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