i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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