Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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