I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
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