guys are not supposed to queef...right?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
