This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
