You can't motorboat a personality
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
