We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
