wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
