Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
