is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
