Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
