Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
