the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
So vagazzling was a success
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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