Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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