Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
