i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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