at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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