So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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