how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
