I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize