3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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