real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
