So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
