at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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