i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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