The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
