I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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