thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
