Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He felt like a one man threesome
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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