Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
