Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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