im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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