And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize
