and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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