Can Purell be used as lube?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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