OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
