Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize