Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize