You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
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