also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
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Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
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I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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