"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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