Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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