I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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